Speaking of That Girl, and coming to terms with not being her, I have also come to terms with the fact that there are many things I am not that many men are into. If we're talking about traditional gender types, I'm not the most girly girl out there. Rather than getting gushy over romantic comedies, I find most of them annoying or even offensive. And though I'm fine with initiating and sending signals of interest and enjoyment of a person, I can't shamelessly throw myself at them the way most girls do and respect myself in the morning. Over the years, I've learned to be responsible and take care of myself, but also don't want to be any guy's mom -- a role many women will gladly assume in exchange for a life-long boyfriend. I'm a DJ -- and last I checked, that was a largely male-dominated field (though the stats are slowly changing on that).
Perhaps I display more self-sufficiency or confidence than is comfortable for most men. I think at times, my speaking my mind has gotten me into trouble or put me in a box -- with both men and women. Many men want a damsel in distress, who can make them feel like a hero or savior. Others want the opposite -- someone who will cook them meals and set their calendars for them. And still others seem to want the hottest girlfriend trophy. As for me, I think Billy Joel said it best, "I just want someone that I can talk to." But as a girl with such varied interests and opinions as I have, I realize that is easier said than found.
"Too many guys think I'm a concept, or I complete them, or I'm gonna make them alive. But I'm just a f***ed-up girl who's looking for my own peace of mind." -- Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
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