Westside 'Til I Die

On Friday evening, during its 2-hour traffic time block, KDAY 93.5 FM aired a tribute to DJ Hideo: his last recorded set. I made sure to leave work at 4:55 so as not to miss a minute of this. I started my car and immediately I heard a brief summary of Hideo's influence on the hip-hop music scene in LA and on the airwaves at 100.3 FM The Beat. And with the very first song, Mark Morrison's "Return of the Mack," I suddenly felt as though he was right there in his element: spinning his favorite party jams and West Coast favorites - a set he would be remembered by. I could see him so clearly in my mind doing it, picturing his way of adjusting the platter, scratching and immaculately transitioning songs, adjusting his EQ, moving with grace and joy to the music. Heavy D, Lighter Shade of Brown, SWV, LL Cool J, 2Pac, Biggie, DJ Kool, MC Breed, Naughty, By Nature, Paperboy, Soul 4 Real, the list goes on. It was a classic Hideo set. He loved the old skool.

I texted a few friends I thought would be interested and who might be on the road to listen to notify them of the set, and got responses back: "Listening now!" "I never met him, but I feel myself tearing up." One friend tuned in with family, and updated me that they were dancing to the music. In addition to the many DJ friends I had who I knew were listening to every move of the set, tweeting their emotions through it to the rest of us, my own close friends were listening because they knew what a rough week this has been for me, and have carried this burden with me the last 14 months.

In that moment, I felt God comforting me through the music I knew we were all both mourning and celebrating to at once. I felt a strange mix of happiness and heartbreak. I remember Hideo mentioning a couple of months ago that he had been recording a bit, which I couldn't even imagine in his condition. I think he was preparing for this time, and somehow knew that this would be a comfort to his friends and his own reminder to us of what DJ-ing is all about: the love of the music. It has been a rough week, but suddenly I felt inspired to spin again. I spent a good part of today just putting songs together that I love. I wanted to honor my friend and his heart for music.

I'm so grateful that in a week of grieving, God has surrounded me with the amazing people I get to call my friends. A special shout-out to Jason, Gregg, Carlos, Pastor Ken, Debbie, Eric, Helen and Jade. Most of them have never even met Hideo, but God has given them a heart to pray for him and his family because they love me. Though I must accept that I will not see Hideo again in this life, I have felt God reminding me through these guys that he is real and with me, and that the reality of something better awaits. I have a road ahead of me as I continue to accept life without Hideo, but I won't be doing it alone.