Nibbling

Most days, I'm at least somewhat able to hold onto hope that something good out there awaits, whatever that may be. I'm grateful for what I have -- a job I enjoy with coworkers and a boss that I respect and like, a community of friends that I know love me and would be there for me in a minute if I needed them, parents who raised me to value authenticity in myself and in those around me, and the list can go on. 

But once in a while, the wear and tear of disappointment or loneliness that sometimes comes with growing in different ways than those around me can get the better of me. Once in a while, there's a long-term wear day.

But as I sit in my room tonight, feeling the weight of future "what-if-nots," I know that somehow this will all help me love and suffer with people better in the end. Somehow it's the difficult stuff that makes the most difference once you get through it. And I can at least hope in that.